Thursday, February 14, 2008

A Truly Poop-tacular Day



  • 10:00 a.m. Speed Doctor's nurse calls to let me know that she has results from my Blood Glucose test. It's Diabetes positive. I need to come pick up a monitor and some test strips and make an appointment with Speed Dr. for Monday. Also what pharmacy should she call my new prescription in to?

  • 11:00 a.m. Call work to tell them I'll be late. Get box from Dr.'s office. There are no instructions, just a note to sign up for class at hospital. Oh, and there are no appointments available until Wednesday.

  • 11:30 a.m. Go to pharmacy. Must wait 20 minutes for pharmacist to check his voice mail. Nope. No prescription called in for me.

  • 12:15 p.m. Arrive late for staff meeting. Confused two projects and looked like an idiot. A slightly frantic disheveled idiot.

  • 12:30 p.m. The cell phone I forgot to silence begins playing Shenandoah in the outer office over and over again. Everyone politely ignores it.

  • 2:00 p.m. Check messages on my cell phone whose ring tone I must remember to change when I get home. Bear's teacher is frantic because he won't do his homework. You and me both, Lady.

  • 2:30 p.m. The tub spiggot the plumber "fixed" at 7:00 last night (4 and a half! hours after our appointment time, did I call that right or what?) burst again.

  • 3:00 p.m. Spouse wants to know what wonderful desssert I'm making for Valentine's Day. Now all I can think about is my sweet beloved diet Dr. Pepper, never to be sipped again.

I feel an overwhelming urge to move to some little cabin off the grid and chuck big city life for good. Somebody please cue the theme song for The Beverly Hillbillies.